Remembering our loved ones

 Dateline 28th November 2023

(Posted on Jacob's Blog, Seventh Heaven Blog for Cathedralites and Kooler Talk (Web Version) Blog for St. Stephen's College alumni.

Cathedral & John Connon School 59ers have lost many of our ones in the last few years. 

Here is a partial list of those from our 2969class who have passed on. 

(I do not have any information about our lady classmates except dear Farhana. I hope someone will update me on this.)

Ashok Ruia

Bala Parasursman

Dossu Pagdiwalla

Fali Dhondy

Farhana (Kably) Poonawala

Farukh Kanga

Flicky Shroff

Hasnain Chinwala

Indrajit Shah

Jacob Eapen 

Jack Haskell

 Jaswant Ghatge

Kurshed Balsata

Michael Colaco

Murali Balani

Naubir Mohindar

Pradeep Bhakar

Prem Goel

Ramesh Mirchandani

Virat Gidwani

Trevor Newnes

I have deliberately left out from this list, one of our dearest, who was tragically lost  15 years ago, Ashok Kapur.

59erGolden Reunion Directory

Our Mumbai 59ers met as a memoriam to Ashok

At our 2009 Golden  Reunion of 59ers,  Annikki and I dedicated our Reunion Directory to Ashok with these pages:

But besides Ashok, we lost many others during those fateful days, which has been brought to mind by Rajiv Bhatia on his Facebook page.

26/11

Remembering the late - Ajit & Monica Chhabria, Sunil & Reshma Parikh, Sanjay & Rita Agarwal, Rohinton Maloo, Mohit Harjani, Lavina Harjani, Anand Bhatt, Pankaj Shah, Vishnidas-Nilam-Gunjan Narang, Neeti-Uday-Samar-Kang, Rupinder Randhawa, Ashok Kamte, Hemant Karkare, Vijay Salaskar, Tukaram Omble

I also remember one of my other alumni from St. Stephen’s College with this post from our alumni Facebook page. 

None other than the heroic Ashok Kamte:

Ashish Joshi , the Moderator of our alumni Facebook   page posted this.

LEST WE FORGET

This is what my friend & college senior, Gary (Justice Anupinder Grewal), wrote in the memory of late Ashok Kamte (Gary's batchmate) a brilliant police officer who attained martyrdom on 26/11. Late Kamte was a friend & one year senior to me in the College .

ASHOK KAMTE

I have been attending the annual St. Stephen's College, Reunion very frequently ever since I passed out of college in 1987. However, this year on 14th December, it was drastically different as it turned into memorial service for Ashok Kamte and I was entrusted the painful task of paying tribute to Ashok. 

It was a tragic personal loss as besides being my classmate in college and a friend, I had the privilege of living with Ashok and his family at his mother’s Flat in Hira Mahal on the Amrita Shergill Marg for about year while studying law. 

Ashok had joined us at St. Stephen's College for his Post Graduation after he had Graduated from St. Xavier’s College, Bombay. What stood him apart from the rest of the Stephanians was the enormity of his physical stature, which alongwith his quest for academic excellence was a rather unique combination. What surprised many was why is the National Power Lifting Champion pursuing Post Graduation at St. Stephen's. There is no preference for sports persons for admission in M.A. Little did they realize then that Ashok always strove for excellence, whether in the classroom or the playing field. He had single minded commitment to succeed. He was very happy when he was selected to the I.P.S. He used to say that he was meant for action and disliked other civil services for their bureaucratic file work.

While training for the Power Lifting Championship, he would not compromise on his diet. As his mother would not allow him to have more than two eggs, due to its high cholesterol content he would buy a dozen eggs from the market, cook and eat them at his neighbour's house. He had broken three national records in Power Lifting and won half a dozen Gold and Silver Medals. He had also won the Bronze Medal in Junior World Power Lifting Championship. Power Lifting is one of the toughest sport and Ashok would train for hours in complete solitude. Despite his powerful build, he was extremely agile and could sprint quite fast. Besides his love for swimming and squash he would generate amazing pace and bounce while bowling on the rather placid College Cricket pitch at Morigate. He had played an important role in the victory of our team. 

Ashok was proud of the fact that he had the blood of two Martial Races the Maratha’s and the Sikhs. While his father is a retired Colonel settled in Pune, his grand-father was in the Imperial Police. His mother Mrs. Paramjit Kamte,, who now lives in Gulmohar Park is from the well known Bawa Family of Goindwal Sahib and is grand-daughter of Late Bawa Budh Singh of the Indian Service of Engineers. Bawa Budh Singh was the 14th descendent of the Third Sikh Guru, Guru Amar Dass. When I called on Mrs. Kamte, she said that though she is proud of the fact that Ashok has become a National Hero yet at times she cannot comprehend that he is no more. He was the only male member in the family whom she could look forward in times of need. He had perhaps inherited his very fair features from his maternal grandmother Mrs.Surinder Bawa (maiden name Violet) an English Lady. His sister, Sharmila, a well known model and a ballet dancer, now runs her famous Dance Academy in Dubai. His wife, Vinita, stays at Pune alongwith his sons, Rahul and Arjun. Besides serving the U.N. Force in Bosnia, Ashok had also trained in Punjab for some time. 

Ashok was known for his high integrity and efficiency which was evident in his earlier stints in Maharashtra especially in Solapur, where he had brought an inflammable communal situation under control within a few hours. I had spoken to Ashok sometime back when as Commissioner of Police, Solapur, was in the news for bringing to book the local M.L.A who was flouting the law for noise pollution. Ashok had personally gone and arrested the M.L.A. from his residence at mid-night after the M.L.A. had earlier roughed up police officials. I had asked him whether he had really beaten up the M.L.A. He replied that if he had done so, the man would not have survived as though he no longer competed in power lifting but maintained regular exercise regime. It was his conscientiousness, patriotism and devotion to duty which made him the target of the terrorist attack at Mumbai. He was the Additional Commissioner, (East) and even though the area around the Cama Hospital(South) did not fall within his jurisdiction, he had reached there as he had undergone specialized training to handle terrorism and hostage situation. He would lead from the front and was not the kind to send subordinates to do risky jobs. He lived for others and had a proactive approach. He made the supreme sacrifice and attained martyrdom in the battle field and made his family, friends and the nation proud. "

Anupinder Grewal

Additional Advocate General, Punjab (Now Judge, Punjab High Court)

Let us each keep a moment’s silence, wherever we are, to honour of all our alumni. Founder’s Day for the school was November 14th. That for our college is 7th December. 

May all these dear ones friends 

Rest In Peace.

Speaking with Bill

Yesterday evening I rang to Toronto, Canada, to wish my Physics teacher of 50 years ago a very happy 85th birthday. I also spoke to Pushpa, his wife, who had also been a teacher in our Mumbai school. My classmate, 59er Hasnain Chinwala (Chinnie), who also lives in Toronto was with Bill (prearranged) when I called as we, 59ers, paid our respects to a man who firmly shaped our lives.

That Bill and Pushpa attended our 50th year reunion in Mumbai last year was itself such a joy for all us 59ers. They lent their solidarity with a class of boys who have traversed the world and sought success based on the fundamentals of life that were instilled in us by our teachers. Not just our classroom performance, but our moral values were instilled in us by these wonderful Gurus!


(Photo thanks to the 64er Rajiv Ved when we took time off for a fee minutes to attend their reunion in Mumbai.)

In the olden days, as per the Indian Civilisation, the Guru was a man to be revered. All of us 59ers have revered all our teachers during the ensuing years. But Bill and John (who was our class teacher and our English teacher in 1959) are very special as they took the time to travel a long distance at great expense, many thousands of kilometres, to be with us as we reveled in our past last November.

In our conversation we talked about many things - including the greetings from other 59ers (which Hasnain had forwarded to Bill,) the loss of another wonderful teacher, Alberto Zavala from peru, our geography teacher, the exploits of Greg, our Chemistry teacher, and the whereabouts of many past Canadian Cathedralites, as Torontian 59er Narsys, but not just our classmates, as 63er Monty Wilson and 49er Peter and 51er Sheila (née Contractor) Vaney, and Peter's brother, 57er Herbert.

Now that Pushpa and Bill live right in the centre of Toronto, a stone's throw from Lake Ontario, I will make it a point to visit them soon as my grandson, Samu, an Ice Hockey fan, wants to visit that great city, with his Grandpa, to see one of his favourite teams play.

Happy birthday Bill - we love you!

Alumni Dinner

Apologies - Several of you wondered where my posts had gone after Day 2. By some quirk, they entries had gone into another of my blogs. I have shifted them back to my main blog, so go backwards to read everything after Day 2!!)

After our hasty retreat from the Church, we left home at around 20:45 to go to the Blue Sea on Worli Sea Face for the Alumni Dinner. (Just to tell you that 56er Ubi had brought me an Old Boys tie to wear at the Church. What a thoughtful gesture.)



The Blue Sea Event was a huge affair - with over 600 people attending. I was greeted by the Alumni co-President Viral Doshi who said that he had a present for me and that I should see him before I left.

Annikki was exhausted. I soon found a large round table. 59er David and wife, Jane, and Annikki and I sat down there. We found that this table had been reserved for us 59ers.

It was HOT under the canopy and within a few minutes I was consuming gallons of soft drinks.

People of all years were searching for me. I realised now how widespread my blog was being read. Knowing I was attending, alumni of all years were asking others if they knew me and whether I would meet up with them! Crazy!

Everyone wanted to call me for dinner or give me some present. 64er Rustom sent me a box of dried fruits. 69er Prakash sent me a hilarious "head scratcher" and a car seat briefcase hanger while he sent Annikki a beautiful pair of earrings. Annikki does not wear earrings but she knows what to do with what she got. 54er Sadhana had a key chain for me and gift vouchers for Annikki! A candle holder and candle from......, and so on. Thanks to all of you. But no more presents - Please? This blog is for our fun - not to promote myself!

I met 54ers Ravi Jaitly, Rolf Sonawalla. 54er MP Rahul Bajaj came to greet me. I chatted with 52er Yoku Hamied CEO of Cipla, 57er Shyam Chainani, the well known environmentalist and Roxanne Davur, who is running the Terra Anima Trust for Animal Welfare. I met 63er Ashok Adavani of Business India. 49er Yezad Kapadia was around and wanted to speak more at the Delhi get-together organised by the Delhi Chapter. All the 64ers who I had already met came to say hello and brought more friends.

Many were friends from the past. Many were my heros while at school. Yoku had left before I joined school, but he was active in the Kanga League and I used to go and see our Old Boys Team cricket play. I told both Yoku and Shyam of the wonderful work that they have been doing - one bringing the Indian Pharmaceutical business into the limelight internationally and the other for setting the tone for India in the environmental context. I am sure that Roxanne can do with all the help any of you can give her.

I met 69er Sheeba Eapen, younger sister of late 59er Jacob Eapen. Sheeba is a friend of my Italian contributor, 69er Barbara. Sheeba has promised me some photographs of our 59er and a short write up about him.

It was wonderful to meet up with 54er Zarine Aga and her husband Minoo. Zarine has become a dear friend.

As I wandered around I was stopped every few metres - I was greatly embarrassed by this as I could not respond with my usual "I know you" response. People talked to me about our late cat, my late mother-in-law, Annikki's snowmen and her cakes. People knew us intimately and I did not know them.

59er Farhana brought her son, also a Cathedralite, to meet me. What a wonderful youngster.

Madhu, Ashok's wife, to whom I had given one copy of our Class Directory told me that once she had reached home, she had read the whole book from cover to cover - a great tribute to Annikki and me from a good friend.

Annikki declined to have dinner. she was in great suffering. I made an attempt to eat the wonderful spread of food - but the heat made the food unappetising.

By now the sound in the hall had become unbearable. I wonder what it was like in the dance hall? I decided to call it a day as we had to set off early today by car for Alibaug.

Alumni co-President, Viral Doshi had a special gift for me.



This is the Alumni Tie which is being released for the 150th year celebration of the school. It is indeed a grand gesture and in return I gifted one copy of our 59ers Directory of our Golden Reunion to the Alumni.

They are planning a similar publication for the 150th year celebrations. The stakes have been raised and they have to come with a publication better than what we 59ers have turned out.

Our reunion, the 59ers, is certainly the Mother of All Reunions, the reputation of which will be further enhanced tomorrow when we proceed for a day of fun and games at Alibaug.'

Thank you Alumni for the signal honour -I love you all and I love to blog for you. Keep those emails coming, but do also let me have a photo, so that next time I can identify you and not be embarrassed that only you know me.

So by 10:30 we were in our taxi driving back to the Guest House. Both of us were exhausted, but i decided to complete the entry. Unfortunately some error was being generated, so i could not post this entry till the morning.

Stay tuned for more.

Unwanted tragedy and our Open Obituary

Ashok Kapur
Born 19th April 1943, Died November 2008
The funeral will be held at Bainganga at the end of Walkeshwar Rd towards the Govs residence, Mumbai today 29 Nov at 4 pm.

Dearest Madhu,

As the world wakes up this morning, Annikki and I cry with you, dearest Madhu.



For the past 48 hours or more, ever since 59er Shivi (Retired Captain Vijay Shivdasani) wrote to me that a “friend” was missing in the Mumbai episode, and a few hours later, 59er Ooky (Elijah Elias) told me that the “friend” was our most dearest and precious 59er Ashok, Annikki and I have been in constant prayer for him, you and your entire family.

Ashok was the first of my “friends” that Annikki met in 1964 in London. Since then Ashok was never just a “friend” to Annikki, as she knew that bond that existed between us 59ers was not just a friendship but something much deeper and closer than even a brotherhood.

When I started the Seventh Heaven Web page, a few months later, our very dearest 59er Bala (Bala Parasuraman) died in a kidney transplant operation, Annikki and I dedicated our web effort to bring together a group of people around the world who had more in common than just being the Class of 59.

What I write here today is, not just of the thoughts of Annikki and me, but people across the world who are feeling the deep sense of grief that we know you and your family are going through at this instant, as we are, with you, part of that FAMILY.

I did not start our Seventh Heaven Blog or Google Group to send out sad news such as this. But with the passing of Ashok, I have to use this medium to communicate across the globe and shout into the vast Universe - please God let this senseless killing stop.

Madhu, Annikki and I are socio-political animals as we fight, peacefully with the power of the pen, for justice.

On March 31st 2003, when the Egyptian President Hosni Mubarak said the U.S.-led war on Iraq would produce "one hundred new bin Ladens", driving more Muslims to anti-Western militancy, he did not tell us that it would result in the death and destruction of innocent lives of many non-Westerners around this globe. He did not tell us that it was OUR innocent brothers and sisters that would be destroyed by a gangs of people, organised armies and unorganised armies, both terrorists, who hide behind a facade of political viewpoints of their choosing, and ethnicity, religion, colour, caste and creed, to cause the pain and suffering to you and us.

As Annikki and I drove out of a supermarket about 12 hours ago, 59er Ooky called me and informed Annikki and me that one of our dearest brothers had lost his life in the Mumbai terrorist attack. His voice was shaking with the deep emotion and pain that he was going through as he asked me to relay this news around this globe. I cried and Annikki cried as we sat in our parked car and understood the pain that you and your family and all of us would go through as we faced this horrible reality.

Ashok Kapur, born 19th April 1943, was a leading member of the 59ers. He and I were appointed Prefects in Cathedral School already in the 10th Standard. Cricket wicket-keeper for the school as well as playing as inside left in our school hockey team, Ashok was also a good badminton player. As a friend of his who was playing badminton with him recently said, Ashok was still a good player!

Ashok was a wizard with numbers and with people, which was why he went into banking. Although coming from different parents, we were twins in many ways, not just because we are both Arians!



Ashok’s entire family was like my family just as much as he was part of ours. The Marine Drive house was more than home to me as both Ashok’s parents would greet me, and all of us his classmates, with broad smiles and open arms, a glass of juice, and something sweet, whenever we even dropped in casually. Sister Pramila’s home was open house to me when I was studying in Delhi.

Ashok was the contact for me with my 95 year old uncle, Mr. K. M. Philip, (father of 53er Sen Philip and 58er Peter Philip), your next door neighbour in Petit Hall on Napean Sea Road. Every year Ashok would do me the favour of dropping in to wish my uncle and report back to me on his health. This personal relationship was deeply valued by every member of my extended family as they saw Ashok and you, not just as neighbours to Mr. and Mrs. Philip, but as our eyes and ears in the life of our uncle.

Madhu, you had a miraculous escape and we thanked God for that even as we prayed and prayed constantly for the safe return of Ashok. But with each passing hour we knew in our hearts, and as many of us kept a prayer vigil across this globe, that we had lost one of our most beloved brothers.

It is difficult to write the Obituary of such a dear friend as every word brings back memories and the tears gush from the eyes. I have started this several times but stopped as each word has a depth of emotion in my heart that makes it impossible for me to convey the grief that is there.

Who would have thought that our Ashok will not be there at our 50th Reunion next year? His passing has redoubled my intention to bring together every 59er and his / her family so that we be together for a short while and know each other as Ashok and I knew each other.

But he was present at this year’s Founders Day Cathedral Church Service representing our 59ers. He was there at an event that evening and as 57er Bhupinder Singh Anand and School Captain of us 59ers in 1959, put it to me when he asked me to convey his grief to you and your family, he told me how Ashok had modestly said to him that he was “the founder of YES Bank.”

Dear Jacob,

I am distressed to just learn from a flash message on TV that Ashok Kapur, Chairman of Yes Bank, was slain in the terrorist attack on the Taj.

Please convey my condolences to his family, friends and colleagues through your network, who have been anxiously seeking news of his whereabouts and welfare through the police helplines over the last 24 hours.

I embraced him warmly - alas too briefly - at the Class of 1958 dinner at the Joss a couple of weeks back, with a feeling of pride at his self-made achievements in life, as he modestly informed me that he was the founder Chairman of Yes bank.

Bhupinder Singh Anand

Ashok started his career in banking at the very bottom, attending the National Grindlays Banking School in London. He used to live in the Bank Student Quarters in Blackheath in deep south London. I would visit him there regularly. He would also often travel up to north London to meet up with me, just to gup shup about “things”.

Even after leaving school we stayed in close touch, visiting each other and staying with each other whenever we visited the city where the other lived. On one of my rare visits to Calcutta, I remember him as the Branch Manager in a Grindlays bank when he took me there to show me the unopened computers the Union had not permitted to be used.

When he was in Delhi, I had many choices as to where to stay - Ashok being one who would always insist that I stay with him. As he said in a recent email, when he was late in acknowledging my birthday greetings as he had been away in Dubai, we were both Arians. Whenver I visited Delhi we would meet for lunch in Connaught Place when he was the Branch manaager there. In Bombay i would visit him in the Flora Fountain Branch when he was going through his most troubling time in his bank career as he stood on HIS principles and suffered the consequences, happily! Probably only you, Madhu, and I know those details as it spurred him to even greater heights and greater success in his fabulous banking career!

Although I have conveyed our deep feeling of personal bereavement to you and children through Ooky, this open letter to you comes not only from Annikki and me but every member of the Class of 59. I know that I do not need to ask their permission to include them in my signature!

Annikki and I have been numbed by the impact of this news as we grieve one of our dearest friends. I am sure that every person who knew Ashok will also claim that he was their dearest friend - as that was the very emotion that Ashok evoked in everyone. That was why he was the successful banker!

One not need look further than the last mini-reunion which was held in Mumbai to reunite our class with Trevor Newnes - which was hosted graciously by you and Ashok at your residence. Ashok wrote to me to tell me that he had missed Annikki and me there and thanked me for bringing us 59ers together.

Madhu, I could write a volume of our personal relationship but this may not be the time and place. As we go through this sleepless night I will put together my photographic record of Ashok which spans the 54 years of our relationship when he sat next to me in Mr. Timmin’s 6th Standard on the first floor and welcomed me to the happiest days of my life in our Cathedral School.

The Class of 59 will remember all our departed friends this coming November.

I am sure that Ashok will be there amongst us in spirit and we will all honour him together.

Madhu, Ashok was not alone in passing as we also ask all our friends to remember another greatly loved Cathedralite teacher, Mrs. Roopinder Randhawa, who lost her life at the Taj Hotel. Along with tributes to Ashok which have poured into my email Inbox, I have had many remembering this wonderful teacher, whom I did not know, but now know was in many respects like Ashok - dedicated to those around them.

Madhu, the tears have not stopped flowing in this Arctic wintry location. It is just past 4 am, 12 hours since Ooky informed me. In those 12 hours there has not been a second where I have not had Ashok and all of you in my mind.

Dearest Madhu, Annikki and I pray that his soul will rest in peace.

Your friends in deep shock,

Annikki and Jacob
Along with every single member of the class of 59